Cal and Tanner discuss the Presidential Debate trainwreck, Trump’s near death experience, the genius of Wilford Brimley, and their latest segment: “Who gives a shit?”
Cal and Tanner discuss the Presidential Debate trainwreck, Trump’s near death experience, the genius of Wilford Brimley, and their latest segment: “Who gives a shit?”
You are a racist.
00:04
And you're a limousine liberal.
00:06
If we met today, we would never be friends
00:08
Who said we're friends now?
00:09
you date teenagers.
00:10
And you're going to die alone.
00:11
I just threw up in my mouth.
00:12
One word, my friend diarrhea,
00:14
I'm going to kill myself.
00:15
that would be a great start.
00:16
**** ***
00:16
You ****
00:17
you're
00:17
***
00:17
a rich *******
00:18
You're a bigger *******
00:21
My name is Cal Baxter and this is the * ***** podcast I'm here with.
00:28
Well, I don't like that intro *** ****
00:30
Yeah, I don't like it either. Let me try that again.
00:31
No, it's calob mean that I'm like a guest.
00:35
This is the 52nd episode of the ****** podcast Um Cal Baxter.
00:40
And I'm Tanner Boylan.
00:41
You are Tanner Boylan.
00:43
And it's better
00:44
Was that
00:44
like
00:44
better
00:44
that, yeah?
00:45
all right? Banner last weeks episode damn did we get a lot of Mail?
00:50
A lot, not an not good Mail.
00:52
No, it was hateful Mail and it really was surrounding our segment on Jerry Maren who is the last surviving Munchkin.
01:02
I don't know can you call him a munchkin anymore
01:03
Well,
01:04
after the Mail
01:04
that's
01:04
that
01:04
the thing.
01:04
we got?
01:05
So what happened was we got this cease and desist letter from a major New York City law firm from the Center for little people in Youngstown, OH.
01:14
Yep, they ripped us a new one.
01:15
God they ripped us an ******* is awful.
01:20
It's not even funny because frankly, it looks like there they're pursuing some sort of an action against us.
01:27
Well, So what happened was that Merrin kept referring to himself. As a Munchkin
01:32
Yeah.
01:32
now, who
01:32
No.
01:32
knew in 2020 that that was not a politically correct term?
01:36
That little ****** really screwed us.
01:38
That **** hole.
01:39
He seemed pretty happy when he was here, but apparently when he got home he changed his mind.
01:44
That little ****
01:46
He's a little, you know. He is a little **** where you know we can never know we
01:52
Now
01:52
OK
01:52
we can't
01:53
we
01:53
say that.
01:53
should read we should read our our response to the letters
01:59
Yeah.
01:59
that we received. It's very serious.
02:01
It is serious, so we want to make a public apology to the Center for little people in Youngstown, OH. About the comments we made regarding Jerry Maren an using the term Munchkin.
02:15
And to be fair, we didn't. We really didn't mean it was all in good fun, but they
02:21
Everything
02:21
didn't
02:21
we
02:21
take
02:21
say
02:21
it that
02:22
is
02:22
way.
02:22
in good fun, but you
02:23
Yeah.
02:23
know, sometimes you gotta make the apology and you gotta look, we gotta grow.
02:27
We know
02:28
We
02:28
we've never we've never had this before.
02:30
No.
02:30
They really, they really went off on us
02:32
No.
02:32
an of course again. Once again we apologize. I'm going to read it right off the paper. We apologize to the Center for little people in Youngstown, OH, and to Jerry Maren.
02:45
We really apologize to Jerry Maren. Let's move on. You know last week. Trump. Your president and vice president, former Vice President Biden had their first debate, an Oh my God, was that a ***********
03:00
Yep. There's not much else to
03:03
Now
03:03
say
03:04
we don't really
03:04
it
03:04
want to
03:04
wasn't
03:05
talk
03:05
good,
03:05
about it except
03:05
no screw
03:06
except
03:06
it.
03:07
yeah, it made me wonder if you put Trump and Biden in one of those octagons where they do like those MMA fights, what what do you think would go down?
03:16
I think Trump would kick Biden right in the nuts and fight would be over.
03:21
Yeah,
03:21
And
03:22
but I.
03:22
buying the only thing Biden would do to try to defend himself, he would grab Trump's hair.
03:25
Oh, and he's so fat look. The guy is so heavy when he goes down he's down. There's No 8 count. I mean he's not coming back up. I think Biden's kind of quick. I think he's kind of slinky.
03:35
Yeah, yeah, I think Biden would fight just
03:38
again.
03:38
as dirty as Trump either way.
03:39
One in the morning last night, you and I were calling each other and we were up all night talking about the fact that Donald J Trump and melania his wife.
03:47
he
03:47
they
03:47
tested
03:47
both
03:48
positive
03:48
tested
03:48
for kovit.
03:48
positive for
03:49
He's
03:49
Kovid
03:49
got covid.
03:49
and while we were doing this show we found out something else.
03:52
What was that?
03:53
Vet Trump was sent to Walter Reed, the hospital that treats presidents. You know.
03:58
prostate issues
03:58
The right is
03:59
and.
03:59
always saying that you elect Biden. You elect elect Kamala Harris, who I know you have a thing for.
04:05
Yeah, she's Cute.
04:06
Yeah, nobody
04:06
She
04:07
wants
04:07
something.
04:07
to hear you moan like that, Tanner. That was pretty gross.
04:11
Is a little. It was a little creepy, but that's that's OK.
04:13
So Tanner, we'd like to talk about a new segment we have here called the * ***** wishlist and the * ***** wishlist is all about celebrities that we hope to get on the show.
04:27
Yep.
04:30
Now I'm excited about
04:31
What
04:31
it.
04:32
would it kill you to be emotionally invested in this?
04:34
Now you know what it is. You know why I'm angry.
04:38
I know why you're angry because it's the first celebrity that we want to talk about who we're dying given the show. And of course I'm talking about the Great Wilfred Brimley.
04:47
he was supposed to be our celebrity guest coming up, but what happened? one word Steven.
04:53
One word is all you need for that half brain Dimwit Steven, who works for us and were itching to have Brimley on the show, or a huge fan of cocoon. Even maybe a bigger fan of his his Quaker Oats work.
05:07
We love
05:08
In
05:08
the Quaker Oats.
05:09
Oh well, his commercial work is classic unprecedented.
05:13
Now. And we were close to getting him until we put this in the hands of Steven And then what did we find out.
05:23
Well, we found out that he never got through to Brimley's agent or manager or
05:28
Never,
05:28
attorney or
05:29
never,
05:29
anyone associated.
05:29
even, never even tried.
05:31
Yeah, I mean, Brimley Productions, I assume he's got a production company that's
05:35
Yeah, who
05:35
globally
05:35
even knows?
05:36
recognized. I don't know
05:38
But
05:38
anyway.
05:38
Wilfred, you wanted to talk about, well, for just a couple of things, even
05:41
Sure.
05:41
though we'll never meet up
05:43
Sure.
05:43
whi. Was he on our list of most desired celebrities? He dropped out of high school. And he was a cowboy.
05:51
Yeah, see Brimley was a man of the Earth.
05:54
The man of Man of the dirt.
05:56
Yeah, he's a man of the dirt never, never, classically educated, but God that guy had St smarts.
06:02
He did any a hell of a hell of a commercial for Quaker Oats.
06:07
you know, it's funny. You and I spent hours devising this Quaker oats kind of oat off where we're going to eat with Brimley in studio. Never going to happen.
06:17
Remember the idea for and this was part Stephens idea and I actually liked it. The oat wrestling would get to
06:25
Yeah.
06:25
fill up a small backed up and we were going to have the wrestle off.
06:32
Yeah, I wouldn't. You know, friendlies, an older guy.
06:34
Yeah,
06:34
I didn't
06:35
he
06:35
want
06:35
went
06:35
to give my heart attack
06:35
well.
06:36
but that
06:36
I don't
06:36
but.
06:36
think we were going to have him in there,
06:38
No
06:38
so
06:38
no
06:38
we're
06:38
no
06:38
good.
06:39
no no. I think a couple of our listeners, a couple of our Brimley fans were calling in and you know, they wanted to be part of that. Wrestle off.
06:48
I was going to get my wife in there.
06:50
She'd be great.
06:51
She'd be great, but she fights dirty.
06:53
Let's move on. So you and I are constantly on social media, media, cable, television
07:00
Yep.
07:00
streaming platforms, always looking for some good future guests for the * ***** podcast. So I'm on HBO Max the other day and I run across this movie which I've never seen before. I've never heard before. It's called Gone with the wind and it's a sprawling epic set against the backdrop of the Civil War. They got this
07:20
Cool
07:20
young gun,
07:21
title
07:21
oh, great title. Young guy named Clark Gable Handsome Devil. He is so kind of magnetic on the screen and I'm wondering if this is someone we could.
07:30
Let's get him.
07:31
I think it's someone we would like to get on a future podcast.
07:34
I think he's really old.
07:36
Well, he may be old now. I don't know when the movie was shot. It was in Glorious Technicolor.
07:45
I have a feeling we could get him now. let's put it this way. I haven't heard too much about this guy in the past 10 years,
07:52
No.
07:52
so it sounds like a guest would be perfect for our podcast.
07:55
He'd be great for us and Steven. I know you're listening in the other room putting this thing together. Let's get on.
08:01
Steven's not listening to ****
08:03
Well.
08:03
he doesn't listen to our show.
08:04
That's the problem actually,
08:06
But that's
08:06
but
08:06
the problem.
08:07
we will tell him after this episode is over to call Gables people. Then let's get that guy on. So our next guest on our wish list is.
08:17
Boo. Burt Reynolds
08:18
Oh God, he's great.
08:20
Do you remember that movie that deliverance?
08:22
the deliverance or deliverance as you're calling it, I think, came out about five years ago. I want to say in 05 oh 625 26.
08:32
Yeah
08:32
Wow.
08:33
porn porn. Ned Beatty.
08:35
So this guy got Ned Beatty, he gets lost in the Woods and you
08:40
Yeah.
08:40
know he's approached by these Appalachian types.
08:44
What do you mean by that? Apple
08:45
Well,
08:45
agent types?
08:46
trying to be politically correct.
08:47
Woods people
08:49
Woods
08:49
Woods
08:49
people,
08:49
people.
08:50
Woods people an there they see Ned Beatty and they find him
08:55
Baby.
08:55
someone
08:55
****
08:55
attractive.
08:58
But baby doesn't find them that attractive.
09:00
No.
09:00
Does he know?
09:02
No. the sounds that come out of Beatty. During what's what's really unspeakable, I don't know. Even say on this podcast what
09:10
No.
09:10
happened, baby, can we?
09:12
No,
09:13
Well, I don't
09:14
I
09:14
know if the.
09:14
don't think we want.
09:16
I don't know if the FCC
09:17
I think
09:17
overseas
09:17
time
09:18
what
09:18
to
09:18
we
09:18
move
09:18
say.
09:18
on. Time to move
09:20
Yeah,
09:20
on.
09:21
it's definitely
09:21
Portland
09:21
time to move
09:22
will
09:22
on.
09:22
just leave it at poor. Ned Beatty. So Burt Reynolds.
09:25
But
09:25
I think we can. I think he's around again. Not a young guy,
09:29
No,
09:29
but would make a great guest.
09:30
but the stories that Reynolds is going to talk about in a
09:34
Yeah.
09:34
future episode of the holes podcast is going to be there going to be precious.
09:37
He's a, He's an icon, another another icon.
09:40
Very iconic. Tanner, when it comes to Burt Reynolds, I know you're a fan and you're looking forward to him being on the show. What are some of your favorite Reynolds films?
09:51
I'm dying to ask him about boogie nights.
09:53
Call He's so good in boogie nights.
09:57
I believe he was the character of Dirk Diggler.
10:00
No, I think that was Mark Wahlberg.
10:03
You sure he wasn't? Was he roller girl?
10:06
No, I think that was. Heather
10:09
Who,
10:09
Graham
10:09
who cares? He wishes great in that movie
10:12
He was
10:13
even
10:13
great.
10:13
though we don't know who he was.
10:14
Now we don't know who he was, but I think there's a good shot 'cause we haven't seen Reynolds in a long time that we're going to get him on the ****** podcast.
10:23
and then the 3rd guest. We just want to mention that's coming up next
10:25
Now this
10:25
month.
10:26
one I'm excited for.
10:26
Well, who wouldn't be excited for the great the legendary Burl Ives.
10:33
most people don't know the name Burl Ives, he is the voice of Rudolph, the Red Nose reindeer
10:40
Here's
10:40
and
10:41
a show that
10:41
all
10:41
came out
10:41
the
10:42
in
10:42
associated
10:42
the 60s.
10:42
characters, yeah.
10:43
Yeah, I mean. The voice of an Angel Number One.
10:50
Number two, I mean this guy's Got Talent that you haven't seen since I don't know Sammy Davis Junior.
10:56
An one fact that we found out after we booked him that we did not know prior to booking. He is an extremely wealthy guy
11:08
Very
11:08
from
11:09
wealthy.
11:09
from Rudolph.
11:11
Yeah, I mean if you think about the number of times that this show is aired all over the world and the residuals that he's getting Ives is loaded.
11:20
Low. That he's he is a not quite a billionaire, but from what I understand Multi 100 millionaire.
11:28
Powerful man.
11:30
Just from just from Rudolph.
11:31
Yeah, You know just to move on. We have a new segment that I'm really excited about. I know you're really excited about
11:38
Not
11:39
and
11:39
really,
11:39
the listeners well.
11:40
this was this was. I mean, this was your idea. I'm not.
11:43
It was
11:43
I'm not
11:44
my
11:44
that
11:44
idea,
11:44
just.
11:44
but I think at the end of the day this is a segment that's going to work and I think it's going to be entertaining to our listeners. And it's called who gives a ****
11:53
Yep. Yep.
11:54
Why don't you tell us this very, very compelling story?
11:58
Jessica Alba.
11:59
Big fan.
12:00
Who got her start on Beverly Hills 90210 is now revealed that during the filming of Beverly Hills 90210, which was 20 years ago, she said, and I quote I couldn't even make eye contact with any of the cast members, which was really strange. When you were like trying to do a scene with them.
12:21
I'm not apparently this was a big a big disappointment in her life that she could not make eye contact with them. And now that she's got her billion dollar or what is it? The Honest Company.
12:32
Well
12:32
I
12:32
before you
12:32
don't
12:32
say
12:33
think
12:33
that, I
12:33
she
12:33
mean can
12:33
gives a
12:33
I?
12:33
****
12:34
Can I just reply to that story?
12:36
Sure, sure,
12:37
Who get
12:37
tell us what you think.
12:38
who gives a **** so stupid.
12:41
I don't know why she gives a ****
12:43
I
12:43
and yet
12:43
think celebrities.
12:43
she's been all over talking about
12:45
I
12:45
this.
12:45
think celebrities are in constant need of sympathy, that's why.
12:51
Yeah yeah, I'm sympathetic to her. I'm sure it was traumatic at the time, but today, why does she really know? I don't think she gives a ****
12:59
Now
12:59
I
12:59
we
12:59
don't think she does.
13:00
maybe she doesn't and we certainly don't give a **** but I will tell you now you.
13:04
I don't even see that's the problem. Why did we even include this?
13:08
I don't
13:08
This
13:08
know.
13:08
is your idea for a segment, and it doesn't make any
13:12
Here's
13:12
sense.
13:12
what I want to know. Who is got more? Coyne Burl Ives or Jessica Alba?
13:19
Oh, that may be a tough one.
13:21
Yeah,
13:21
That's
13:22
she's
13:22
a
13:22
got
13:22
That's
13:22
that
13:22
a
13:22
honest
13:22
battle
13:23
company.
13:23
of the Titans.
13:23
Yeah, now I'm more of a more of a group guy.
13:27
Yeah, I could see that you have a very you're very soft skin.
13:34
I
13:34
Very
13:34
take that
13:34
soft
13:34
as a compliment.
13:34
skin.
13:35
I take that
13:35
Yeah,
13:35
as a compliment.
13:36
yeah.
13:36
Thank you.
13:37
I've I've rough skin but
13:39
Oh
13:39
I don't
13:39
yeah.
13:39
really. Again, I don't give a ****
13:41
Right, I would say I would call your skin course.
13:45
Yep, Yep.
13:47
Tenor, as you know at the ****** podcast we receive thousands of fan, email and letters per week.
13:55
Well, maybe maybe maybe hundreds,
13:58
Well, maybe hundreds.
13:58
maybe 10
14:00
OK.
14:00
now.
14:01
But occasionally we like to read one on the air.
14:05
This comes from Mary Fitzsimmons from Weston, Weston, and she says dear Callan Tanner, my name is Mary Fitz emits a big fan of the show
14:17
Yep.
14:17
and I was wondering if I could come into the studio and meet you. There's
14:22
Hum.
14:23
more in the letter, but that was the Gist of it.
14:25
Now
14:25
That's
14:26
I know
14:26
the part
14:26
our gut
14:26
that I.
14:26
reaction to that is always no.
14:28
But then we saw the pictures.
14:29
Then
14:30
She
14:30
we saw the pictures.
14:32
just again, Mary included some pictures and a little biographical information. She's 34 years old
14:38
Yeah.
14:38
and a fitness. What would you call her
14:42
Well,
14:42
a?
14:42
um, you
14:42
She's
14:43
called her
14:43
into fitness.
14:44
you called her an underwear model.
14:46
Jenna door model,
14:47
Don't
14:47
but
14:47
know.
14:47
she is into fitness and some of the pictures were more revealing than others. We appreciated all of them
14:55
Here's
14:55
equally.
14:55
what I did not appreciate
14:57
The
14:57
when
14:57
Palatine
14:58
you. Well, no, I did not appreciate
15:00
She
15:00
when you
15:01
she.
15:01
turn to me when you turn to me in the studio and said at this after we open other pictures you turned to me in the studio and said, can you please leave for two minutes?
15:10
I did not say that
15:12
Well, that's
15:12
I took
15:12
that's
15:12
no.
15:13
my recollection.
15:13
I had the pictures in the comfort of my own home, but I'll tell you, we both agreed that she's void the warranty on her palate and
15:21
Oh
15:21
she sent us a few of those little video files an that Pellaton is just she's just wrecked it forever
15:29
Well, I know
15:30
an.
15:30
you follow her now on Tick Tock.
15:31
I do and she's gotta stop the tick tocks are Terrable Gangnam Style in a in a bikini and whatever she was doing it's
15:41
She's flexibel though
15:41
she
15:41
you gotta give her that.
15:43
we get sweep some weird. Seriously, we have some weird listeners. She's either going to come on to the show and marry us where she's going to kill us both as we leave the studio
15:54
It's
15:54
and
15:54
an either
15:55
I'm
15:55
or.
15:55
not sure which.
15:56
It's an either or scenario, but in any event, you know Mary sort of want us over. I will not. I do not appreciate the fact that you object to fire even though
16:05
No
16:05
I just did.
16:05
idea was objectifying or we agreed to meet her, but not
16:08
We
16:08
in the studio because the studio is closed to visitors. So we agreed to meet her at Fika,
16:14
Yes.
16:14
our favorite coffee shop.
16:15
Yes, we are going to meet her at the coffee shop next week and we're going to record that session. So we're going to
16:21
And
16:21
tell
16:21
we're
16:21
everyone
16:22
going to
16:22
about
16:22
bring
16:22
it.
16:22
and we're going to bring Steven for security
16:24
Yes.
16:24
because we think she may try to slit our throats.
16:27
We have no idea what's going to happen, so.
16:29
Well, you know we shouldn't use her, we get we're gonna get another letter we we
16:33
I don't
16:34
agreed.
16:34
know why
16:34
We
16:34
I find.
16:34
work in the user
16:35
I
16:35
last
16:36
find
16:36
name.
16:36
something about Mary Seductive. Compelling.
16:40
That's you know what I think you're going to meet her and figure.
16:42
Well, between the two of us, I'm the single one, so.
16:46
Yeah, you should go meet her
16:47
Alright,
16:47
'cause she's
16:48
well.
16:48
definitely going to kill you.
16:49
OK, well we'll see what happens with Mary.
16:52
Alright.
16:53
But we know there's something about her.
16:55
It's gonna be bad you're gonna die.
16:59
OK.
17:00
so last week we get a phone call from one of our one of our game show. Really, I'd call him a game show crushing away.
17:07
He is he
17:08
Mr
17:08
is.
17:09
Gene Rayburn.
17:11
Yep.
17:11
So gene is hosting a new show called match game. And I think he's taking some sort of sabbatical of some sort, and he's actually asked
17:19
That's
17:19
us.
17:19
how I feel about it.
17:20
Well, come on. I mean he's
17:22
I
17:22
asked us
17:22
got.
17:22
to cohost. A week of match game.
17:27
We're not going to.
17:29
Don't you want to do
17:29
Do
17:29
it?
17:29
you really want to go?
17:30
I want to do it. I want
17:33
We're
17:33
to do
17:33
not
17:33
it.
17:33
getting. We're not getting paid.
17:35
No, no, we're not. We're doing it for gene.
17:37
I know, but he got. I don't think I have it in me.
17:43
Yeah.
17:44
I gotta be honest, I don't think I have it in me. I know you're excited to do this, but it's it's and I know it's for charity.
17:50
Oh yeah.
17:51
But I don't think I have it in me.
17:54
All proceeds that we would have been paid to host match game for a week is going to go to the center.
18:03
I
18:04
Little
18:04
know
18:04
people
18:04
this is This
18:05
and
18:05
is
18:05
Youngstown,
18:06
why
18:06
OH.
18:06
I'm Yep and This is why I am so freaking not jazz to do this.
18:12
So Tanner, before we wrap things up, I
18:15
Yep.
18:16
do want to let our listeners know that next month in November is sweeps week very important month for us. And we've got news.
18:25
We We have, yeah, this is actually big news.
18:28
This is big.
18:28
We are going to be in London at our London affiliate for sweeps week an. Depending on how this goes we could be bumped up into a much higher bracket.
18:44
Yeah. The Ailes podcast next month in November is going to be broadcasting exclusively from Abbey Road Studios in London, and boy, are we excited?
18:54
Which I don't know if people know, but that was where you're going to be in the exact studio where The Beatles recorded.
19:01
It's unbelievable and we've got a whole list which we're going to reveal next week of some of the British guests we're going to have an we are. I mean, I can't wait. this is going to cost us a fortune being in London for the week, but you know, we do it. We do it for fans.
19:19
Well,
19:19
Let's face
19:20
we did
19:20
it.
19:20
and we do it for ourselves.
19:22
No,
19:22
Let's
19:22
yeah, we
19:23
be
19:23
pretty
19:23
honest,
19:23
much
19:23
I mean we.
19:24
pretty much do it for ourselves. And Speaking of ourselves. That wraps up another episode of the ****** podcast.
19:32
Now get the **** out of our podcast.