Trump or Biden: Who Gives a F**k?

The host podcasts would like to welcome our newest sponsor, the Made off family of funds. 

00:06

You know, in these uncertain times, you need a financial advisor you can trust. Since 2008, the made off family of funds has achieved an impressive 51% annual rate of return, helping our clients live their best financial lives. 

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The made a family of funds is the official financial advisor for the * ***** podcast. Inquiries can be sent to Mr made off at the Federal Correctional Complex in Butner, North Carolina. 

00:56

This is the * ***** podcast. I am Cal Baxter. 

01:00

And I'm Tanner boiling. 

01:01

Tanner, we are so excited. We have literally hundreds of thousands of people listening to us live. It is Tuesday, November 3rd, 9:00 PM Eastern Standard Time. Most of the polls have closed and boy do we have a great group of statisticians to help us out. And we're going to call the election tonight. 

01:18

Well, we've got some great inside info. Not all of it obtained legally. 

01:22

No no, 

01:22

You 

01:22

no no. We don't really work by legal means, but but at the end of the day, what we call tonight will be correct. We've earned the public's trust. 

01:30

somewhat called election tampering. 

01:32

Well. 

01:32

I like to call it campaigning. 

01:34

At the Angels podcasts we often have saying vote early and often. 

01:38

We have turns out you can put in about. I mean anywhere from four to six ballots. 

01:45

Nate Silver from 538. Jeffrey Toobin, who can't find a job, are all in the background, 

01:50

We 

01:50

Who else do we 

01:51

are 

01:51

have? 

01:51

the only people who have people actually in the polling booths. I don't mean at the polling centers. We have people in the polling booths that have popped up there who are counting votes for us. 

02:01

We have drones over most polling all over 

02:04

What 

02:04

the place. I 

02:05

we 

02:05

mean, this is 

02:06

do 

02:06

serious. 

02:06

actually. 

02:07

You know, you know it is in order to enter, the public has lost confidence in the traditional network, San cable networks and their ability to call the election. After 2016, it was a complete **** show. Would you agree? 

02:20

Yeah 

02:20

OK, let's move on we. I am getting some new information from Steven Tanner. We have information on the state of Florida. Apparently we can call a winner. 

02:33

we've got 13 million votes counted at this point, and we're ready to call a winner becausw 89% of the vote went for Biden. 89% unprecedented. 

02:46

Not since Woodrow Wilson has anyone won that kind of lead in Florida? Pretty amazing. 

02:52

Yep, Yep it is pretty amazing now. I spoke with my Grandpa Morty who is direct from Del Boca Vista 

03:00

He's 

03:00

and 

03:00

kind 

03:00

he said 

03:00

of a. 

03:01

not only. 

03:01

He's kind of a bellwether, isn't he? 

03:03

Oh he is. He is known as the Oracle of Del Boca Vista. 

03:08

Yeah. 

03:08

He's predicted every presidential election you ready for this since 1902. 

03:13

He's also predicted every World Series if I understand. 

03:15

Every World Series he has predicted storms he predicted Hurricane Sandy. 

03:21

Now brilliant guy. 

03:22

Morty Morty predicted last night that Biden would have 90 between 90 and 95%, 

03:29

Pretty 

03:29

which I 

03:29

amazing, 

03:29

said 

03:30

yeah. 

03:30

Morty. You're crazy, you're crazy. It's never going to happen 

03:33

amazing. Once again the host podcast is calling the state of Florida unequivocally 

03:37

It's 

03:37

for Joe Biden. 

03:38

in, it's done. And I mean this is only 9:00 o'clock on Tuesday night 

03:42

And let's move on. Tanner, we would be remiss if we didn't start out. The Angels Podcast by talking about our good old dear friend, Sean Connery, who passed away only four days after his last interview, which was with us on October 27th. We are heartbroken. Tanner, what are some of your fond memories of Sir Sean Connery? 

04:08

the fact that we were the last known interview that he gave. I mean, it's really. It's a humbling sort of a thing 

04:16

Oh 

04:16

that 

04:16

yeah. 

04:17

we were the last people to interview him before his passing. It's it's a little bit eerie. 

04:24

Yeah. 

04:25

I mean to think that we were we were it for him. I hope we. I hope we did him proud being the last interview. I mean he was a little. I have to say we did have a few. We have to stop the interview a few times. 

04:38

Yeah, 

04:39

For some some 

04:39

he was a little erratic. 

04:41

he was a little erratic, a little little little off. I mean, we've had great times with him in the past, lots of interviews. But to think that he gave us the last interview and there's some notion in my mind. I'd like to think I don't know, even though this may not be true, but I would like to think that when he heard the episode. That that's why and how he passed that he was laughing so hard just hearing himself on that episode that he said. Now I've I've done everything. I've had enough laughter in my life and it's time to call it quits. I think I'd like to think that's how it happened. 

05:17

Yeah, We 

05:17

last breath 

05:17

gave 

05:17

in. 

05:18

him the gift of laughter he 

05:19

We 

05:19

gave 

05:20

did. 

05:20

us. He gave us the gift of life. 

05:21

Yeah, 

05:22

I learned 

05:22

yeah. 

05:22

so much from Sir Sean. 

05:24

alot of lessons about interacting with women in general, but our wives in particular lessons 

05:32

Yeah. 

05:33

about how you should live your life. 

05:36

one of our role models for how to. Respect women. Has been Sean Connery and to that end we want to play. Sort of a retrospective. Of the Sean Connery interviews that we've had with him over the last. I want to say 10 to 15 years. 

05:55

At least at least 15 years, it's been probably more, but at least 15 years. 

05:59

Alright, here we go. 

06:53

You know, Tanner, now that I hear this back, it's not quite as I remember. 

06:58

Now it's it's a lot worse. 

07:01

It's a lot 

07:02

He's 

07:02

worse. 

07:03

he's him, but much more of him. In a twisted 

07:06

Yeah, 

07:07

way. 

07:07

benched. He's 

07:07

way. 

07:07

kind of bat **** crazy. 

07:08

His batch are crazy. 

07:10

Yeah, well anyway, we send our condolences to the Connery family. We're very sorry for their loss and let's move on. OK, Tanner, before we move on, Steven has informed me that we can now call the very, very important state of Michigan with Governor Gretchen Whitmer. Has she been on the show? I can't remember. 

07:29

Gretchen hasn't been on the show officially. I'll tell you where Gretton Shin has been. 

07:33

Yeah. 

07:33

She's been on. She's been on Stephen's computer screen. I'm going to tell you right 

07:37

Yeah. 

07:37

now. I don't trust anything that Steven tells us about the state of Michigan. Stephens been sitting with his computer screen. His screensaver is now a picture of Gretchen. Whitmer with she's sitting on some kind of a throne. 

07:50

Yeah, 

07:50

I don't know what's going 

07:51

it 

07:51

on with 

07:52

might 

07:52

her. 

07:52

have been a Game of Thrones thing. 

07:54

I'll tell you this, Steven Stephens definitely obsessed because 

07:57

Yeah. 

07:58

he's been camped out in Michigan for the last few 

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He 

08:01

weeks 

08:01

really 

08:01

and he 

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has. 

08:02

almost got picked up in that raid. 

08:03

Well, she's a handsome woman. 

08:05

I don't really even know how to respond 

08:06

She 

08:06

to that 

08:07

is. 

08:07

she's 

08:07

She's 

08:07

answer. 

08:07

handsome. 

08:08

I've never heard that term. Handsome 

08:09

Well, 

08:09

woman. 

08:10

You know she has a definitely has a Jami Gertz vibe to her. 

08:14

Yeah 

08:14

Do you remember 

08:14

yeah 

08:14

Jimmy Kurtz? 

08:15

Steven yeah of course. How could she was in all the right moves? 

08:20

I was thinking less than 0. 

08:22

Yeah, that too. 

08:23

Yeah. 

08:24

This same movie, 

08:24

Yeah. 

08:24

same movie, different slightly different 

08:26

I'm 

08:26

plot. 

08:26

pretty 

08:26

I 

08:27

sure 

08:27

wouldn't trust anything 

08:28

I'm pretty 

08:28

that 

08:28

sure. 

08:28

Steven says. 

08:29

So tender, I mean, let's let's just stop the suspense and let's stop talking about Gretchen Whitmer and talk about what's important. Which is this Joe Biden has taken the state of Michigan. 

08:42

then, then we're calling it. 

08:43

We're 

08:43

it. 

08:43

calling the state of Michigan for Joe Biden and let's move on. OK, with more breaking news with 13 million, 350 two 1195 votes in. The Great State of Ohio tenor. We 

08:58

Or 

08:58

do have a winner. 

08:58

just the state of Ohio? 

09:00

Well, 

09:00

Let's call it 

09:01

why 

09:01

that. 

09:01

do they call some states great? 

09:03

Ohio's not one of 'em. 

09:05

No. 

09:06

Do you know this is a true fact about Ohio 

09:09

Yeah. 

09:09

Mork? It's like New Zealand. More New Zealand has more sheep than people. Ohio has more cows than people. 

09:16

lot of beef in that state. 

09:18

Lot of beef lot, lot of cow tipping alot of cow animal husbandry 

09:24

Oh 

09:24

among 

09:24

yeah, 

09:24

some 

09:25

it's 

09:25

of the 

09:25

very 

09:25

farmers. 

09:25

big now. 

09:26

Oh 

09:26

Is it true 

09:26

yeah. 

09:27

that people are allowed to have carnal knowledge with animals in Ohio? 

09:33

You can **** all the cows you want. 

09:35

OK 

09:36

It's 

09:36

I was. 

09:36

nothing. It's not even frowned upon. 

09:38

Oh, 

09:38

Not 

09:38

OK. 

09:39

only is it not illegal, you can do whatever you want there. 

09:41

Interesting, so it's more 

09:42

Yeah. 

09:42

of a badge of honor. Tanner? Our audience is on the edge of their seats and they want to know what happened in the state of Ohio and we are. We're happy to make the call. call. 

09:52

90% is in and I'm going to let you give this one. 

09:57

This is again fascinating. 87% to Joe Biden, 87% to Joe Biden Biden takes. The Great State or not so great state of Ohio Donald Trump falls short, but this is still a very close 

10:10

Yeah. 

10:10

contest. I'll tell you what Tanner this presidential election is far from over. 

10:14

Well, not really that far from over in the state of Ohio, because there you've got two things you've got. People who love Biden, and people who love cows 

10:24

Is there any scenario where the cows will be allowed to vote? 

10:26

But 23 cows cast their vote all in favor of Biden by the way. 

10:30

now I understand Steven was big into cow tipping when he was a teenager. 

10:34

Anne. 

10:34

He grew up in Columbus, did he? by his own admission he's been intimate with cows. 

10:39

Yes. 

10:39

Those are the words he used, not mine intimate. OK, 

10:42

He 

10:42

we're moving on and we have more breaking news in another swing state this time. Pennsylvania tenor. What's going on? 

10:51

Well, first of all, just to back up for a second. As you know, Stephen was in Pennsylvania well before the election when all the looting was going on the writing, the protesting. 

11:02

He was in Philly. 

11:02

He was he was in Philly an 

11:04

Yeah. 

11:04

You know what Steven still 

11:06

No. 

11:06

were looted? He brought me back. Some Neutrogena ultra sheer dry touch sunscreen. 

11:13

Yeah. 

11:13

He took a whole case of it. 

11:15

Yeah, not exactly the kind of thing I mean. If you're going to loot, you know I 

11:18

He 

11:18

wouldn't loot for a case. That's probably 2299, 

11:21

he 

11:21

but. 

11:21

risked his life for this stuff. 

11:23

Anyway, 

11:23

some more. 

11:24

we do have numbers from the state of Pennsylvania, and I believe this goes too and you'll be happy about this Donald Trump. 

11:32

Yeah, 94% in 

11:34

Oh 

11:34

favor 

11:35

come 

11:35

of Trump. 

11:35

on, 

11:35

Yeah, 

11:36

come 

11:36

that's 

11:36

on. 

11:36

what that's what our pollsters are telling 

11:39

Oh, 

11:39

us this 

11:39

that 

11:39

was. 

11:39

is a remarkable 

11:40

This was supposed to be a swing 

11:41

lead. 

11:41

state, remarkable. 

11:42

Wow. 

11:43

Not a swing state. Not anymore. Pennsylvania is going to Trump in a big way big way. 

11:49

Ann, we have the breaking news that we've been waiting for all evening. The state of Wisconsin. With 

11:57

Yeah. 

11:57

99.99% of the votes being tallied. We can predict a winner. Tanner tell us what's going on. 

12:08

So here's here's first of all, I don't want to, you know, we need a little bit of a drum roll 

12:13

Oh 

12:13

because 

12:13

sure. 

12:14

this is. This is big. I mean, Wisconsin was holding all the cards. Who knew it? Who knew that Wisconsin will be the decider? I'm just going to say it goes for Biden. 

12:22

It goes 

12:23

90 

12:23

for Biden and we'd like to announce and I know you hate this Tanner 'cause I know you're a Trump guy. That Joseph Robinette Biden junior is the 46th president of the United States. Joe Biden has one. He will be inducted in January. Into the 

12:38

we're 

12:38

presidency. 

12:38

doing a great public service. I mean, you do not need to vote anymore. The results are in. Based on our calculation. Stay home, drop, drop, whatever ballot you have and just rest easy. 'cause the decision is in. 

12:54

Not only you don't need to vote, but you don't need to watch network cable TV read the 

12:59

Turn 

12:59

newspaper 

13:00

it off. 

13:00

for the 

13:00

Go 

13:00

next 

13:01

to 

13:01

couple 

13:01

sleep. 

13:01

of weeks. 

13:01

Watch, 

13:01

Don't worry 

13:01

watch 

13:01

about 

13:02

some 

13:02

it. 

13:02

Netflix. 

13:02

Biden is 1 now. How do you feel about Biden winning tenor? 

13:06

you know who I'm more interested in? I 

13:07

Gretchen 

13:08

neck. 

13:08

whitmer 

13:09

Yes Yes we need we need the next problem I am nominating. I'm throwing her in the ring. The next president of the United States, Gretchen Whitmer. 

13:18

Yeah 

13:18

And Cole, we gotta, we gotta head out of here because I just got a phone call with some some setting news. 

13:26

What's 

13:26

It 

13:26

up? 

13:26

turns out that Steven was at a rally 

13:29

Yeah. 

13:29

he was. He was trying to get some Intel for us on the vote. An apparently was I don't know he was holding some sort of a Abidin sign abiding plaque, 

13:42

Which 

13:42

whatever 

13:42

is against 

13:42

it was. 

13:42

our policy. We're not supposed to be partisan. 

13:44

Well, but he's he's a big Biden fan 

13:46

Yeah 

13:46

as we 

13:46

he 

13:47

all 

13:47

is, 

13:47

know, 

13:47

yeah. yeah. 

13:47

and apparently some Trump people came out and beat the living **** out of him. 

13:52

Oh, that's awful. 

13:53

He's he's in the hospital 

13:55

OK. 

13:55

so we've got to find out and and. To add insult to injury and just let me preface this by saying he is OK, he was shot somebody actually. 

14:05

No. 

14:06

Yup, somebody shot him. Thank God with a pellet gun. 

14:10

You know something as you're talking. I just got an Amber Alert. How old is Steven? 

14:15

Stephanie is actually 12. 

14:17

No. 

14:18

Mentale mentale 

14:19

Oh 

14:19

12. 

14:19

I see. Oh youngston. Listen, this is serious. We will give you an update on Stephen's condition. Congratulations again to Joe Biden. We're off to Cornell Weill Medical Center And this is the * ***** podcast. I am Cal Baxter. Thank you for listening. 

14:35

and I'm Tanner boiling now get the **** out of our podcast.